Published On: Fri, Apr 17th, 2015

WATCH: Harrison Ford (and Chewy) in New Star Wars Teaser

The film is coming out Christmas, and we plan to download it illegally ASAP.


OK, admittedly — not much to see here. But you do get some action shots with black guy in storm trooper uniform (we wrote “black guy” cuz he ain’t African American in a galaxy far, far away, right?), and a few more quick cuts, of everybody’s favorite renegade spaceship getting shot at, leading up to the final couple frames with real-time Harrison Ford and his eternal partner who hasn’t aged a bit.

Oh, and there’s a Mark Hamill voiceover about his life as a jedi and how he comes from a long line of Jedi, then a rolling skull of his daddy.

The film is coming out Christmas, and we plan to download it illegally ASAP.

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