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Files Expose English Plot to Abduct Loch Ness Monster

Loch Ness Monster

Apparently the Scots had more to worry about than a Rod Stewart comeback tour. Secret files have opened that reveal the plans of the Duke Edinburgh in 1933 to catch the Loch Ness Monster dead or alive for the Natural History Museum, as revealed by the Daily Star. The Duke of Edinburgh was hellbent on getting that creature, seen by so many people so its existence could not be denied, on display, even if it were merely a carcass. He even enjoined the Royal Navy to be involved with the desperate search for the rare but oft-sighted creature.

To prevent bounty  hunters from getting their paws on the creature, British officials preferred it be shot on sight. According to the documents, the order was, “Should you ever come within range of the monster, I hope you will not be deterred by any humanitarian considerations from shooting him on the spot and sending his carcass to us in cold storage, carriage forward.” Good thing it was a hoax, otherwise we’d have to feel sorry for Nessie’s poor wife and kids.

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